Beautiful

Most of you would probably stare at this and go "EEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!" complete with the capital letters and exclamation marks, but it is one of my favourite yaoi pictures:

It is so beautiful I get a heartache everytime I look at it, which makes me want to look at it more.
Aww, come on now! Admit it's a beautiful picture!

This is why my mom says I'm a pervert -_-'''

My job. A prison.

My job, for me, is like a prison. I sell my soul for the basic necessities. It doesn't seem too bad when you're in there. You work, and in return you get food, shelter and clothes to wear. You have people to talk to. Sometimes you suffer a little. Time passes.

Yet when I step out of office, the sense of oppression and dread I hadn't felt when in that place suddenly falls upon me. It is as though being physically away from the place helps in bringing you to a third person's point of view.

The pressure is stifling, like in a pressure cooker. An overwhelming sense of being trapped, even finding it difficult to breathe. Tears feeling like it is ready to simply burst out but trapped in my chest. 

Why? I wonder. Why this feeling?

Is it because of my ego, so I can't take criticism at work, causing this? Inexperience, thus time needed to adjust to the presence of a job? Ill job fit? Which is it?

"Time to move on then?" my friend asked.

To where? Doing what? 

If this point in my life is a canvas, it would be colours melting off into nothing.

Back to prison.

Crossing over to 2011

The new year saw me crossing over while at a bazaar organized by FleaEscape at *SCAPE Art + Market Street with Pearlin, manning a stall, with the worst crowd I've basically ever seen, the worst sales and organizing glitches. At the end of the thing I decided never to go under a bazaar with them again. Sorry, they were nice people but the crowd was nearly non-existent.

I was deprived of sleep, totally exhausted from pre-bazaar preparations and in a very bad mood. Luckily I had accumulated enough experience at self-control to not blow up at every single thing. Thank goodness for age.

Then I came home to the 2 most wonderful New Year's gifts:

2 adorable terrapins, one male and one female. I've been waiting for this day for such a long time! They have nice, hard shells so they are definitely healthy. But one of them apparently keeps flipping itself over while crawling so I'm a little worried about that.
I greeted them by lifting each of them up in the air and saying "hi" to them. They greeted me back by wildly swimming in the air. Such warm greetings.

Then I spent the next 12 hours in bed on New Year's day, right up until 4pm, after which I had to wake up because we were celebrating my aunt's birthday at a restaurant. Finally met baby Jervelle again (cousin's daughter) with her initially-shy-later-wild character, hi-5s and fantastic love of sharing her food with everybody.

That ends my New Year's day.

2011 resolutions

 A little late, but nevertheless here's wishing all a

Happy, Healthy and Fulfilling 2011! 

Happy New Year!

At the beginning of last year (how odd it is to refer to 2010 as "last year"), I made 3 rather huge resolutions:

2010's resolutions: 

1) I resolve, again, to not get laid. I reckon it's the one resolution I'm most likely to keep.

2) I resolve to play the piano again.

3) I resolve to grow stronger psychologically.

Resolution #1 was actually made from 2009, and presto, I sure kept to it! 

Resolution #2: I didn't play the piano yet again in 2010. 

Resolution #3: I think I did grow some, gaining experience in work and making new discoveries about myself, family and friends.

Alright, let's make some resolutions for 2011.

2011's resolutions:

1) Healthier lifestyle - sleeping earlier, exercising regularly. Basically means better time management, really.

2) Make up my mind what I want to seriously embark on & start researching - Education Psychology? Clinical-areas? Music? Others?

3) Earn more money. I actually have a long-term goal I want to achieve. I want to travel to Japan. My pay really forbids me to do so, not to mention I still have a debt to my mother I need to repay.

4) Continue growing mentally and emotionally.

That is all. Not getting laid is too easy to resolve to do in 2011 so it's not in there =P

What are your resolutions?